Paris restaurants traditionally hew to a set of strict, sometimes unspoken rules, which can be hard for visitors to learn — unless they’ve got this simple guide to the ins and outs of dining etiquette
From childhood, the French are raised to appreciate the art of dining, and the many rituals that accompany it — even public school lunches include a cheese course. Part of the reason you’re traveling to France is, presumably, to tap into that gastronomic reverence. But knowing how to do it right is tricky, particularly if you don’t speak the language. Here’s everything you need to know about Parisian restaurant etiquette, including some helpful phrases. Do as the French do, and you’ll have a much better experience in Paris.
Say bonjour, always
Whether it’s at the post office, a boutique, or a fine dining restaurant, say “bonjour” to every single person you interact with. France is formal in this respect, and it’s considered rude if you don’t acknowledge and greet people. You can use “bonjour” in the evenings as well, but some people will switch over to “bonsoir” at around 5 p.m. The only hard and fast rule? Don’t forget to say hello.
A few additional pleasantries can go a long way, naturally, so also don’t forget to say thank you with “merci,” “bonne journée” for “have a good day,” or “bonne soirée” if it’s evening.
Make reservations…
For restaurants that accept reservations, reserve. Even a casual corner bistro can easily book up. It can be hard for diners to tell if a place requires reservations or not, so unless a restaurant specifically states on its website that it doesn’t accept them, assume you’ll need to book. How far in advance you’ll want to reserve depends on the restaurant. For hotspots like Septime or Frenchie, you should call or check online weeks ahead; for more casual dining, call a day or even just a few hours in advance. French restaurants close more often than American ones, so making a reservation is also a good way to find out if they’re open before you cross town.
Online reservations have finally become more standard with systems like Zenchef, Resy, and the Fork, which will allow you to handle the reservation in English and will send text messages or emails to confirm.
Some reservations will still require a phone call — restaurant websites in Paris are often just an address and a phone number. You’ll almost never be able to view the menu in advance. To phone in the reservation yourself, always begin with “bonjour.” If you’d like to reserve a table for two people on the 15th at 8 p.m., then the French phrase would be:
Mickaël A. Bandassak/Septime
A fig tart with blackcurrant sorbet that’s worth making a reservation at Septime.
Je voudrais réserver une table (I would like to reserve a table)
pour deux personnes (for two people)
pour le quinze octobre (on the fifteenth of October)
à vingt heures. (at 20 o’clock.)
It’s important to use the 24-hour clock to avoid confusion, so remember to add 12.
…and keep them.
If you make a reservation, honor it. Many restaurants in Paris still do only one service a night, because the French like to linger. This means that for a small restaurant, a no-show can have real economic ramifications. If you must cancel, give as much notice as possible. (And definitely don’t double book: Tourists are becoming infamous for making multiple bookings at hotspots on opposite sides of town, then deciding at the last minute which one they’ll keep. This is poor form.) As more restaurants have moved to online bookings, many also require a credit card deposit as a defense against no-shows.
Restaurants will want a phone number in order to confirm your reservation a day or two in advance — remember to give your country code, too. If you don’t pick up when they call to confirm, you may show up only to find that your reservation has been given away. If you’re worried about missing the call — or concerned about international roaming charges — be proactive and call the day beforehand to confirm. If you’ve booked online, you can reasonably expect a text or email that you will be required to confirm.
Know which days to go…
Many restaurants and shops will shutter for the day on Sunday or Monday. Lots of travelers go wrong here by not planning accordingly. Take a look at your list of places to eat, and if any are open on Sunday and Monday, take advantage and visit them on those days.
…and which months
In August and, increasingly, the second half of July, Paris can be a ghost town (except for this year during the Olympics). It often feels like the entire city has gone on vacation, with many restaurants closed for anywhere from two to six weeks. So if the goal of your visit is to eat your way across the city, consider visiting at a different time of year. The end of December, also popular with tourists, is a better bet, but can still be a little risky: Many restaurants close for Christmas and New Year’s, which are family holidays when most people cook at home. If you opt to eat out, you’ll most likely end up paying premium prices for fairly mediocre tasting menus. Rent an apartment with a kitchen instead, and shop in advance like the Parisians do.
Eat at the right time of day
Set eating hours are still firmly entrenched in French society. Lunch is generally served from 12:30 to 2:30 p.m., and, historically, most restaurants would serve dinner from 8 to 10 p.m. This is now changing with the advent of online booking systems that offer two seatings each night — usually with an earlier seating at 7 or 7:30 and the later at 9 or 9:30 p.m. Popular restaurants like Cheval d’Or, Sushi Shunei, or Early June are just a few that now make it explicitly clear that diners must leave within a two-hour time frame to accommodate the second seating, rather than lingering for all hours.
Le Cheval d’Or
The crew at Le Cheval d’Or run a casual operation including an early dinner seating at 7 p.m.
Rebecca Asthalter, one of the owners of Fulgurances L’Adresse, attributes the earlier dining times to a COVID-related shift. In October 2020, during the early waves of the pandemic, France instituted a 9 p.m. curfew for all restaurants, bars, and delivery services. Later in the pandemic, it was moved even earlier to 7 p.m. before being pushed back to 11 p.m. and finally lifted. “We thought it was crazy that people would be coming to eat at 6 p.m. because it’s not in the French way of living to eat early,” Asthalter says. “When we opened Fulgurances, our first seating was at 7:30 p.m. and it was only tourists. It was always a struggle to fill up that time slot.”
But since curfews have been lifted, Asthalter says things have not returned to pre-pandemic norms. “We realized that we were getting more and more requests for time slots at 7:30 p.m., and less and less for 9:30 which used to be the hot time to go to restaurants. Now, we actually start at 7 p.m., and everything is concentrated between 7 and 8:30 p.m.,” she says. “It’s definitely the French people who are pushing for it when they have the option.”
For meals outside those time frames, less formal options are a better bet. Wine bars tend to have more flexible hours, catering to patrons seeking a drink or a snack before or after their main meal; brasseries are open all day, with continuous service; and bakeries and patisseries are good options for late-afternoon snacks. It’s fine to sit in cafes for hours as well, although it’s good practice to pay rent for your table, so to speak, by buying a round of coffees or drinks every so often.
Give up some control
In France, the customer is not always right; in fact, the customer is usually wrong. The chef is an artist welcoming you into his or her studio, and restaurant professionals in both the kitchen and the dining room take pride in their expertise. Enjoy the guidance of the talented team in charge.
Don’t expect too many accommodations
If you have dietary restrictions or food allergies, let the restaurant know about them when you book, as Parisian kitchens are cramped and frequently don’t have a lot of alternatives on hand. You’ll have a better meal — and the restaurant will be more accommodating — if it can plan ahead.
Order like a Parisian
Bistrot des Tournelles
The Marais’s Bistrot des Tournelles is the ideal spot to indulge in an entree, plat, and dessert (go for the chocolate mousse).
On French menus (cartes), the word “entrées” means starters, and main courses are called “plats.” This is often confusing to Americans, for whom an entree is a main course. While Parisians might keep it simple when dining at home, when they go out to eat they tend to commit to the full three-course formule of entrée-plat-dessert. It’s frowned upon to order just two starters, or just a main course.
If you’re not hungry enough for a three-course meal (although remember, portions tend to be smaller here than in the States), it’s better to head to a wine or tapas bar, where you don’t have to follow the standard formula. The options at wine bars range from ambitious, high-end food to rustic platters of charcuterie or cheese.
It’s perfectly acceptable to request tap water. If you go the bottled route, you can often end up spending more on water than you do wine. For tap water, ask for “une carafe d’eau.”
Don’t expect bread and butter as an automatic starter. Bread will often arrive with your main course, to sop up sauces. Unless you’re at a very high-end restaurant, it’s unlikely that your table setting will include a bread plate — the expectation is that you’ll put your bread directly on the table. This can feel strange at first, but you’ll get used to it.
Cheese, if offered, tends to come at the end of the meal, right before, or in place of, dessert. Sometimes you might encounter a fresh cheese like a burrata among the entrees, and at a wine bar you’re of course free to order cheese at any point.
Pay — and tip — like a local
In France, it’s historically been considered rude to bring the bill (l’addition) before a customer has specifically requested it. Whether at a corner cafe or a fine-dining establishment, in the past, you were allowed to linger for as long as you liked. The only downside? You had to be a little assertive to catch your server’s eye. Though that’s still true at some spots, these days, it’s a bit easier to grab your check at restaurants offering two seatings a night, which requires diners to vacate their seats to turn tables.
The price of a meal in Paris includes service charges, so tips aren’t required — but they are appreciated. Most French people wouldn’t leave more than 5 percent, or 10 percent for very good service. Until recently, there wasn’t a tip line on a credit card bill, meaning diners had to have cash on hand to tip. Recently, though, there’s been an explosion of digital payment systems at restaurants and coffee shops, which prompt customers to tip.
“There’s a screen and you have the possibility to add a tip directly upfront to avoid that awkward moment when you don’t know if it’s added or not,” says Asthalter of Fulgurances. “For our staff, it does ensure more tipping because the French don’t necessarily think about it, so to give them the option makes them think about it. I know it was a request from our staff to add it.”
Elyssa Goldberg, CMO of a Paris start-up and writer of the Substack newsletter Bokeh, can pinpoint the exact moment she saw this shift, because she took photos to document it at the end of February.
“Two of my best friends were visiting from LA and they said, ‘Do you tip here? I thought you don’t tip,’” Goldberg says. At the time she said no, but then quickly re-evaluated that statement as “I’ve started noticing POS systems in increasing amounts since then. SumUp has really taken over. [That and] Verifone are the two that are really dominant. Now that they’re everywhere, they’ve started shipping the U.S. features is my guess.” The tip amounts do still tend to be smaller than what you’d see in the States, with 10 percent, 12 percent, and 15 percent being the most common suggestions.
Catherine Down is a James Beard nominated food writer who has been based in Paris for the last decade. She writes for the New York Times, Condé Nast Traveler, Trip Advisor, and Travel & Luxury, among others. Ciao Down is her creative agency which crafts culinary events, bespoke private food tours, and travel itineraries throughout France.
Additional photo illustration credits: Hamburger and tartare by Le Severo; euro coins by OKratsov/Shutterstock; cafe crowd by Kevin George/Shutterstock; menu board by Maziarz/Shutterstock
Le Severo
Dining, the right way, at Le Severo.
